Love and Hip Hop Atlanta: Season 3 Episode 5 

So remember how last week’s episode ended with Karlie Redd giving Young Joc’s realtor/sidepiece a smack down with her purse? Well…we pick up from there, home chick had climbed on top of Karli Redd. Joc runs in and Karlie tells him to “check his ho”. Joc goes off on a tangent saying “he made a promise to God to tell no lies” and he admits that he is sleeping with her.  Karlie calls her fat and a teletubby (perhaps she should reconsider that as an insult especially since it seems that’s her man’s preference). Karlie gets mad an attempts to stomp out but needs a ride from Joc. The side piece stays on the steps and waves and smiles to them. Joc tells her to get out the car, she says no. Joc the Genius gets out the car BUT leaves the car keys in there. Karlie drives off with the car and Joc tells his side piece he’ll catch a ride with her. Bambi and Scrappy, seem to be on again? *confused face*, Bambi once again is trying to force Scrappy to say he loves her, he REPEATS that he loves her and he is not in love with her YET Bambi says he’s just scared and she is not designed to be a baby mama and won’t have a baby unless she is in love (even though she was about to have a baby with Scrappy) sigh. Tammy and Joselyn are together and are talking about everything that ends up with Joseline ragging on Mimi hard about her sex tape.

Scrappy goes to Erica P’s place for “advice” and she is wearing the shortest of shorts with knee socks, sipping moscato straight from the bottle and discussing Bambi’s situation. Erica seems over the whole situation and actually a little angry. Joseline and Tammy are together again because Joseline wants to seek Tammy’s advice on some looks for the spread in the magazine. Some tension starts to brew as Joseline makes a quip about Tammy not having a ring and still sporting that tattoo. Then Tammy takes jabs in the confessional about Joseline’s looks and how she looks trashy instead of looking high end. Joseline in turn says Tammy can never look as good as her (in the confessional). Back to the room where they are, Joseline says she is a size 2 *cough* and can fit into anything but has to show ass. Tammy pulls out a dress she pulled from the consignment store and Joselyn quips that she isn’t trying to look like a grandma and everyone is trying to see ass! Joselyn asks Tammy when she is going to get married. She prefaces with “as a married woman, I can tell you…” then tells her men will be men and she trusts no man.

Karlie, Erica and Rasheeda are out to drinks as Karlie tells us that she returned Joc’s car to him. Rasheeda tells them about the VH1 paid nanny, Kirk brought to the house. She confesses that she’d like to pop up at the sports bar and see what the girl is about. Karlie tells her story with Joc and Rasheeda asks if she is done with him or wants him back. She goes she loves him but she doesn’t know if she can just leave a man because of a side chick. As they are talking, Joc shows up. They start talking and Joc says that she drove him to do it by being crazy and showing up at random places and he couldn’t talk to her but Khadiya is his friend and he used to talk to her. He says all it was was sex. Karlie is in tears as she asks how he could do this to her. Joc says that they deserve another shot and they should rebuild their friendship again. Karli said her ground rules is that he can’t talk or even see Khadiya anymore and once again she asks “Do you love me?” and says she needs to take responsibility for problems in their relationship.

Mimi, Rasheeda and Tammy are at a massage place and Mimi relays her rehearsed sex tape story. Somehow it turns into a Joselyn jab and this lost Tammy of a girl relays her Joselyn story and of course Mimi is all over it and revels in anything that includes a Joselyn bash. Dawn continues her slander fest and sets up a meeting with Benzino…and Mimi shows up. She tells Benzino that she wants Hip Hop Weekly to print a redaction and they never got married. Mimi and Dawn pull out text messages and Benzino still doesn’t agree till Dawn says it would be public record if they were actually married. She then throws in the spread and said what sounded like a threat that if he doesn’t take care of it, someone else will. Rasheeda and the Diddy girl – Kalenna show up at the sports bar where Jasmine has upgraded to a honey blonde weave that isn’t sitting right. Rasheeda asks her if anything is going on and if they talk on the phone. Rasheeda admits that it’s high school-ish but still has to be done. Her friend, Kaleena seems to be more pumped about it than Rasheeda. Benzino and Stevie are in a meeting with Joseline. He tells them about his meeting with Dawn and Mimi and Stevie says “Rose and Blanche from Golden Girls?”

Side bar: Can I just say it was so hard to focus on Benzino with the 2 zits sitting pretty on his nose. Very distracting.

Mimi and Stevie shut it down and Joselyn says they’ve never been friends and all of a sudden they are buddies. Benzino shuts it down and says he will take their words for it. We are now at Scrappy’s 30^th birthday – whaaa? Scrappy isn’t 30? – Mama D calls him up and has Bambi feed Scrappy the cake and Bambi force plants a kiss on Scrappy as he eats his cake. Erica P shows up and Mama D tells Bambi that there’s an “egg in the basket” around. Scrappy introduces them and she apologizes to Bambi about the miscarriage and Bambi goes off and asks Scrappy why he is telling her her personal business. As Erica P tries to diffuse the situation, Bambi clocks Erica P really bad in the face, like my jaw actually dropped. They literally drag Erica P out the party as she kicks and screams and flashes us her white panties.

As always, Scrappy has this incredulous look on his face and Scrappy tells Bambi to calm down. Mama D tells Scrappy that he needs to learn to control his bitches. As she is outside, Erica P goes on about how everyone has had Bambi and Scrappy is the only stupid one to wife her. Bambi asks Scrappy if he is mad at her for smacking his side bitch but it doesn’t matter because she’s the one who rubs his feet every night. She asks Scrappy to give her a kiss to show it’s real (sigh) and Scrappy stares at her for a second before saying “you give me a kiss”, which she does. We end the episode with the party continuing and Bambi having fun while Erica P is fuming outside and saying she will run into Bambi again.